Comments for Samantha Parent Walravens

Comment on TORN Ruffling a Few Feathers on Amazon! by Adriene Coffey

Adriene Coffey — Thu, 09 Jun 2011 22:07:48 +0000

TORN is an extremely balanced, honest look at the struggle many women have to manage a professional/personal life in today’s world. Our choices our many, which is a double-edged sword, and that is what makes it most difficult to strike a balance. THANK YOU, Samantha for these “touchstone” essays that, if you have been in this situation, reverberate strongly.

Comment on Facebook COO Says Women “Lack Ambition” by Amy

Amy — Mon, 06 Jun 2011 23:04:22 +0000

I just listened to Sheryl Sandberg’s speech, and I must say, it gave me chills. I totally missed any reference to the current generation “blowing it” or “lacking ambition.” I found her speech to be totally inspiring, encouraging, and respectful to the career choice of motherhood. I also think Walravens’ book, TORN, looks wonderful and important. And I don’t see how the two perspectives are conflicting.

I have read about the studies Sandberg references, that show women often step back from their careers before they really need to, before they have a partner and a choice to make about making time for children. Unfortunately, this is due to the sense that our society does not support women having successful careers along with meaningful, successful roles as mothers. If women keep engaged and challenged in the workforce longer, they can be more successful, be role models for younger women, and help to create an environment that is more conducive to more women executives, and, ultimately, greater work/life balance for everyone in our society. Walravens’ comment about joining forces IS well-said, and I don’t think it conflicts with what Sandberg says in any way.

Comment on Facebook COO Says Women “Lack Ambition” by RockStarMomLV

RockStarMomLV — Mon, 06 Jun 2011 05:53:08 +0000

You said it PERFECTLY when you expressed that we need to join forces and “the emerging mother’s movement that is calling for better options for integrating work and family; greater respect for the social and economic value of mothers’ work, paid or unpaid; and public policies that respond to the needs of working mothers and dual-income families. It’s not just up to the female college graduates of 2011, it’s up to all of us to make these changes a reality.”

AWESOME!! Thank you!! Wonderful quote and well said!

Comment on Facebook COO Says Women “Lack Ambition” by RockStarMomLV

RockStarMomLV — Mon, 06 Jun 2011 05:51:52 +0000

Oh my gosh…does this woman have kids? I mean, even with four kids, two older kids and twin babies, I have hired help (yes, someone who does my laundry and dishes) but still struggled with staying at home with my kids. I left my career to do so, and my husband and I made this choice together. We both are highly educated and have an expansive background of various work experiences. We decided that at this point in our lives, one of us should be at home with our kids. He was obviously the bread winner, so he won out. But this was a struggle I had…I cried for two months during this decision, and dealt with it for a year.

This is such an emotional topic because it hits home with so many, especially the blogging community who are generally women who chose to leave their lucrative and successful careers to raise children who will be successful, amazing beings. I’m 36, and still took this a little personal. Maybe it’s because it has taken me over a year to find peace with actually being a stay at home mom. And, funny, today I was actually thinking about how long it has taken me to finally accept and enjoy being at home with my kids…they grow so fast, these are moments I would never give up to a corporation. At the same time, there are so many exciting and fascinating new opportunities out there to explore and become an expert in (for example, social media) that I cannot even imagine her stance in this topic.

Even so, it is so hard to raise kids these days…so many different directions they can go and choose. I would never feel confident leaving that direction up to a nanny or other care takers. I need to be hands on with my kids. I want to know that I did the best I could to teach them everything I could. The most gratifying thing that happened this week was at my daughter’s pre-school graduation when she said when she grew up she wanted to be a mom. Being a mom is seriously the toughest job I ever had….and I have a long road ahead of me.

Whatever her reality is…mine is that I seriously worry for her children and I
hope that my kids and her kids are never friends. Or if they are, I hope her nanny has better morals and values than she does.

Comment on Facebook COO Says Women “Lack Ambition” by Mary Ellen Walsh

Mary Ellen Walsh — Thu, 26 May 2011 17:15:44 +0000

I can’t agree with you more. I’m 45 and I’ve worked my whole life, except five years from 32 to 37 when I had three (beautiful) children. Then I slowly rebuilt my career. To say that I’m unambitious, is ridiculous. I teach my daughters, and my son, that you have to work through to balance work and life. I think it’s more about technology blurring the lines between our “lives” and our “life’s” work than just that women as a whole lack ambition. I think women lack resources to help them achieve anything worthwhile anymore. It takes a village to help a mother navigate life.
Good luck with the book Torn.

Comment on Facebook COO Says Women “Lack Ambition” by Patricia Phelan Clapp

Patricia Phelan Clapp — Tue, 24 May 2011 19:48:49 +0000

Samantha,

I couldn’t agree more! As a transition coach that specializes in working with women going through change – I don’t think that our ambition is lacking at all. It think it is the constant juggling we need to do to achieve a mere 1/4 of what we hope(d) to achieve as women, mothers, wives, etc., in the first place.

I think we have been sold a false bill of goods, personally, when it comes to the “have it all” syndrome and what society (as opposed to us) deem as success as mothers and/or working moms.

Instead of defining our success by the rules society has set for us (hint – anyone suggesting we aren’t “ambitious” enough), its time we create our own set of guidelines according to our OWN definition of success. Getting caught up with what everyone else expects from us is what creates all that static in our minds and that “we aren’t good enough” syndrome, anyway.

It’s time we pull up our bootstraps and declare that we are ambitious, and just as ambitious as previous generations. It’s just that we (this working mom generation) is challenging as well s redefining what that term “ambition” really means, anyway. And, it’s about time!

As always, you represent so eloquently and succinctly what we all think, Samantha. Way to go!

My clients are going to have Torn as a goody bag the next time I have a workshop – that’s for sure!

Patti

Comment on After 40 years of fighting for equality, why are women not happy? by information technology

information technology — Mon, 24 Jan 2011 20:56:36 +0000

Valuable info. Lucky me I found your site by accident, I bookmarked it.

Comment on Moms Judging Other Moms by Imene

Imene — Mon, 17 Jan 2011 03:57:08 +0000

I think that women judge each other to validate their choices. We have so many doubts that critisism becomes cathartic.Raising a child has become such an endeavor now that we measure the importance of our decisions as mothers. I think we should try to be nice to ourselves and this will lead us to be nice to each other.

Comment on If Your Have That Nagging Feeling of Uncertainty, Just Say No by information technology

information technology — Wed, 12 Jan 2011 11:22:12 +0000

Nice site, nice and easy on the eyes and great content too.

Comment on Is Motherhood an Addiction? by Swiss Ball Exercises

Swiss Ball Exercises — Wed, 15 Dec 2010 13:06:56 +0000

This is such a great resource that you are providing and you give it away for free. I enjoy seeing websites that understand the value of providing a prime resource for free. I truly loved reading your post. Thanks!